Dealership Woes
Posted by For those of you who know me well, you know I don’t have a lot of spare time in my life at the moment. For example: I don’t watch TV, go to the movies, indulge in spa days with the girls, eat sitting down (although, judging by my stagnant waistline, I consume plenty on my feet), exercise, clean house, sleep, and rarely do I find time to shave. No, there is little normalcy in my life at this juncture. Work, family, busy children, 15 hours of college, and the daunting task of finishing my novel take up the majority of my time. So, when the car dealership called me at work and asked what I thought about trading my car in for one that was brand new for the same monthly payment with no money down, the thinking side of my brain (the side I rarely pay heed to) said, “If it sound too good to be true, it probably is.”
However, my mouth said, “Are you sure?”
“Of course,” said Car Dealer.
“Look, I’m very busy and have a lot of homework tonight,” Mouth said. “If I drive all the way out there and this isn’t the case, I am going to be very, very upset.”
“Ha ... ha ... ha,” cackled Car Dealer. “I promise. No strings attached.”
“That is the laugh of a liar,” Thinking Side said. “You’re going to drive all the way out there, drink one of their free fattening cokes, stand around in your pointy-toed heels for an hour more than they promised, and turn into the Hulk shortly after they offer you the deal of the century on a new car—150.00 more a month than you are currently paying.”
This area of text has been deleted for the protection of the reader. But, may I just say, I hate the thinking side of my brain, and besides that, it was wrong. I didn’t drink the coke.
The following morning, I received a call from the dealership.
“On behalf of the whole Acura family, I would just like to apologize for this terrible misunderstanding,” said the Red-Devil Car Dealer.
“What misunderstanding?” said Thinking Side to Red-Devil Car Dealer. “There was no misunderstanding. I told her it was a joke from the beginning. She just wouldn’t listen to reason.”
“Nothing like this has ever happened before,” continued Red-Devil Car Dealer. “The sale representative you spoke to has been sternly dealt with. I can assure you that this will not happen again.”
“Well, I can most certainly assure you it won’t happen to me again,” I said. “I know this because later this afternoon, I will be making another trip to your dealership to drop my car off with no money down and no future payments.”
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